Why I hate Shakespeare - Jacque
As many of you have heard me endless complain during our brain breaks, I hate Shakespeare with every inch of my body. Despite him being dead for hundreds of years, Shakespeare and I have a mutual hatred. Now, you may be saying: “Jacque, Shakespeare doesn’t hate you! He’s been dead for so long, he doesn’t even know you exist” but I must disagree. If he didn’t hate me, then why do his books still plague my life years and years after his death? At every singular bad thing in my life, there is always a point where Shakespeare is involved. Now for my main topic: why do I hate Shakespeare? Dear reader, let me tell you.
1. His books
Shakespeare is quite literally the most irritating and annoying person to read ever. I would take Nathaniel Hawthrone over him at any time, and I hate Mr. Hawtherone. But my hatred for William surpasses any other feelings I have for any other poet. His poems are annoying, stupid, and boring. They’re so annoying that no one has ever read them by choice. I am unable to think of a single person who has willingly read Shakespeare outside of the context of a school setting. Now, you may be thinking, this is because of the archaic language and sure, that could be a part of it. But the main reason is something much worse. He’s boring. To be boring is surely a death sentence for a poet, and he may be dead, but he still continues to haunt me to this day.
2. The aging of his plays
He’s also well known for writing several plays. One of those is titled A Midsummer’s Night’s Dream. I’m sure you’re familiar with it. That also means you’re familiar with just how– excuse my language– freaking boring it is. From monologue after monologue, the audience is left just wishing it could be over soon. The plot could be entertaining but it’s such a drag to read that it completely overrides it. Sure, it may have been great back when it was written, but I believe that a good play must stand the test of time and A Midsummer’s Night’s Dream. It is my belief that the only people to actually enjoy reading it are middle-aged high school English teachers (sorry Mr. Mitchell!), and future middle-aged high school English teachers. I don’t know what it is about this play but they seem to enjoy it greatly and I can’t see myself ever agreeing.
3. He’s overdone.
Shakespeare is not the pinnacle or the end all be all of theatre or poetry, despite what many think. There is so much better– and more entertaining if I say so myself– literature out there. So why do we, year after year, read works by this dead, misogynistic, white man? There are so many better works to read but we still read Shakespeare. We may sprinkle others in there, but Shakespeare is seen as the finale of any poetry or play unit. It’s been 500 years of nonstop Shakespeare. Please. Just give it a rest. I think I might go insane if I hear a single line of Shakespearan literature again. Every time you give a class an assignment to read Shakespeare, you’re stopping them from enjoying any other author, and that’s a shame.
To end it off, a song about that truly conveys how much I hate Shakespeare: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WyOjkFhhrnQ&ab_channel=GhostlightRecords
Thanks for reading!
Hello Jacque Butts. I, Callie Faye Elizabeth Standerfer, have read and am currently reading Shakespeare outside of class. And I do NOT plan on becoming a middle age English teacher, thank you very much. You say Shakespeare is boring??? Methinks you perhaps just don't understand the dialogue enough to find it funny or entertaining. Despite my liking to Mr. Shake, I mostly agree with your third point. I do believe Shakespeare plays are a good way to get children into poetry but there are so many better poets who aren't dead, misogynistic, white men. I am wondering, what specifically about his works is boring to you? I see no specific poems or parts of plays pointed out in your post and would like to know. Great post J.D.!
ReplyDeleteHey Jacque! I have to agree with my good ole friend, Callie Standerfer! I personally have taken a liking to Shakespeare plays and I can name quite a bit of people who have willingly read Shakespeare outside of a school setting. In particular, I think A Midsummer's Night's Dream is quite humorous and interesting as we read it along in class (I think the pun revolving around Bottom and him being turned into an ass is quite clever). Though, I understand the old English and language can deter younger readers (which is why it appears to appeal more to "middle-aged high school English teachers"). I do however agree with your last point. Putting so much emphasis on misogynistic, dead, white men overshadows many other poets and playwrights, and it is important to acknowledge it. It also raises the concern of lack of diversity portrayed in school curriculums. I would love to hear more about this self-proclaimed "mutual hatred" of you two! Good post!
ReplyDelete